happy happy

"We cough because we can't help it,
but others do it on purpose."
~ Mignon McLaughlin

So many of the people I love are sick. I know it doesn't seem like it now but, you will get better.


We are better here. Mostly. And gearing up for a trip to Virginia where we will be welcoming home my dad! This time next week and he will have been home for two days. The girls are beside themselves with excitement. Not only is PopPop coming home but they will be spending 4 days with their beloved cousin. There isn't much normalcy around here right now. Mostly a lot of spinning about like tops. And add to it all a snow day. Oh, and Valentine's Day parties tomorrow. Can this week get any better?

In which we find Quotations about Feeling Terrible, Sad and Pathetic

" 'And how are you?' said Winnie-the-Pooh. Eeyore shook his head from side to side. 'Not very how,' he said. 'I don't seem to have felt at all how for a long time.' " - A.A. Milne ~ Winnie-the-Pooh

I just got a nudge from Anna, she commented on my last post and began it with, "I think this blog post has been up long enough for table talk...."

Well, Anna. I sat down here yesterday and only managed to read a couple of posts and comment on one, on your blog. Then the earth opened and swallowed me whole.

Actually, it all began 10 days ago on Jan. 27. Early that morning, both daughters 1 and 3 were looking quite peaked and one eventually began a fever, then the other. We couldn't have known it then but it takes about 5-7 days for this to run it course. In the coming days we fell, one by one. The smallest was the next to fall. "My eyeballs hwrt, momma." Then daughter 2 and I found ourselves sprawled on the living room couches this past Friday. My Sweetie seemed unscathed until last night. Poor guy has been trying to keep up with work, take care of us and all of this on very little sleep. He's off working today and we are praying that he will be spared the worst.

This has been unlike any flu I've ever had. On Friday I could only lay on the couch and grunt at the kids. Sometimes I could wiggle a finger for emphasis. It felt as if I was giving a fat man a ride on my shoulders. And I was lying down. Once the fat man left it was like something evil was trying to escape from my insides and wanted to go through my back and shoulders. Sunday was better. I really thought I was on the mend. Monday the fat man was back and this time he was plugging my nose as he rode. I hate mouth-breathing and I'm such a wuss. By Monday night I just wanted to die. I was a mess of chills, aches, congestion and had jello for muscles. Tears of self-pity really don't help the whole congestion thing, ya know. This morning was better. The fat man was gone and I could breathe a little better but a crippling headache had been brewing. Thankfully, I was able to sleep a little this morning while PBS babysat so the headache is gone. I really do feel as if I'm getting better. I was able to make lunch without wanting to curl up on the kitchen floor. Progress.

I'd love to draw some wonderful spiritual analogy or share some snippet of insight that I gained through all of this. I got nothin'. Perhaps He will enlighten me upon a more distant reflection. I'll have to leave that up to Him because for now this is going down in family history as 10+ days of misery and it ain't over yet.

Oh, I would be remiss if I didn't share a few rays of sunshine through this whole ordeal. My friend Ruth called yesterday and said, "Can I bring you dinner?" Um, YES. I hung up my phone and cried. And, on very many of these days I had committed my time to my friend, Tiff, for babysitting. She has been so gracious and so flexible. More crying. At the beginning of the last 10 days my mom was here and kept me company. And yesterday she brought us some groceries. Chicken noodle soup even. :0) Thanks, Mom.

"...Piglet explained to Tigger that he mustn't mind what Eeyore said because he was always gloomy; and Eeyore explained to Piglet that, on the contrary, he was feeling particularly cheerful this morning."
- A.A. Milne ~ The House at Pooh Corner

pointing in the right direction...again

I spent some time tonight reading through some old posts. When I came to this one I immediately thought about another circumstance that I've been struggling with over the past 2 weeks. I really needed this reminder about how to deal with this present circumstance and cast of characters.

The following was originally posted on April 18, '07.

I've been struggling with some circumstances lately and in turn struggling with someone who is attached to those circumstances. It is nothing I would want to or could post about here. And, even if I did, I wouldn't be pointing in the right direction. I would be pointing to my circumstances rather than the One who is in control of them - the One I am to respond to with honor.

My new friend, Karen/irritable mother, from Surviving Motherhood left me an encouraging comment on the last post. Here was what she shared with me: Being Real

The whole post was helpful to me but the very last statement is what the Holy Spirit has been posting on the billboards in my head ever since I read it, "...I can be an encourager. I don’t need to point to my circumstance. I can point to Jesus!!!"

Then the topic in Sunday school this past week built on this for me. That is what I hope to share more about sooner rather than much later. The questions He keeps asking me are "How are you going to respond to Me - show others Me in you - how will My Name be glorified through all of this?"

"...All of you, clothe yourselves with humility toward one another, because,

'God opposes the proud

but gives grace to the humble.'

Humble yourselves, therefore, under God's mighty hand, that He may lift you up in due time." - I Peter 5:5b-6 NIV(click for multiple translations)


I want God fighting for me...not opposing me!

Only 44 Days!

Thanks to any who have been praying for my Dad. When I posted It's Only 180 Days, it was hard to even imagine this day, let alone his return in just more than a month!

So as of right now, he still pretty much looks like this...


He's been able to keep in touch really well via e-mail and phone calls. That has helped us all tremendously. And he's obviously been able to send a few pictures. Pictures aren't really his thang but I'm really glad he has sent them and let me share a couple.

We all loved this one of him with some of the gifts we sent.



Only 44 more days and my folks will be smiling like this again. They took this of themselves (hence the extreme close-up) the day they closed on a little cottage in the Thousand Islands this past summer.


We all are pining to be back there again this spring!
Like this...


We'll keep counting the days, Dad!
I love you.

More of Me *gag*

I've been rethinking this thing. My blog. I want to broaden it's scope.

It represents a portion of my journey and who I am. But often I feel a bit confined. I could go into great detail and explain the hows and whys but that would be boring. For you and for me. And basically, it's my blog and I can do what I want.

So, heretofore (I'm not really sure what that means but it seems to fit here) I will be expanding my post subjects to be more representative of who I am day-to-day. Not that I'll be posting day-to-day. If you've hung around here even a little you'll know not to hold your breath. However, I do hope to post more routinely. Uh, and when I figure out the routine you'll be the first to know.

As long as I'm breathing I will continue to experience the spectacular, irrational love of God. He's been revealing His love to me in so many new ways. He has whispered His love over me even in the last few days. It brought me to tears because He did this in spite of my utter neglect in my relationship with Him. Because I'm His child, His daughter. That's it. Also it is my desire, as long as I am breathing, to keep striving to love others as He has and is loving me. And I'm pretty sure I've got enough challenges to last a lifetime. So, irrational love will quite certainly remain a primary thread here.

Sprinkled in and wound all through the glimpses of Him, the spiritual growth spurts and face-plant failures is the rest of me. The whole of my life here on this earth. I want this to be a more accurate sharing of most of me. Most of me 'cause it just ain't healthy, or pretty, for me to share all.

Thanks for journeying with me this far. I hope you'll stay. Either way, I'll be here.

And now that I've used "I" and "me" and "my" more times than I can stomach, I'm off to brush my teeth. Or wash my mouth out with soap.

While I do, you can divert yourself with this.

Brian Regan - I Walked on the Moon!

New Year...New Post!

"Finally!" I can just hear you and you know who you are.

I've Christmased, Partied (Birthdays, Babies & Congratulations) and Happy New Yeared my way through the last few weeks and it shows everywhere. My waistline (or lack there of) - partied right out of my jeans. My living room - looks as if Santa threw-up there. My blogs - stagnating and boring at least a few of my faithful "blog checkers" who quoted the beginning of the last post to me at one said party.

This post will not be quite so substantial but at least it will be something new to look at.
Amy suggested that I post the recipe for our fudge. So, below is suspect #1 in the expansion of my midriff.

Mamie Eisenhower Fudge
4 1/2 cup sugar
1/2 tsp salt
2 TB butter
1 can evaporated milk
mix & boil 6 minutes

In large bowl have:
12 oz. chocolate chips
4 oz. bitter choc.
2 cups chopped nuts (optional)
1 pint marshmallow cream

Pour boiling syrup over marshmallow and chocolate. Beat until thick and smooth. Add nuts, pour into buttered pan, let cool.

Keep covered in a cool place. Will keep a long while. heh.

More soon...er or later.

True Community. Is it possible?

Ok...I can't help but put up one more Daily Reading from John Eldredge. Denise brought up the previously posted reading in Sunday School this past week. The book it was from is Captivating by John & Stasi Eldredge. (not Waking the Dead as I mistakenly said on Sunday.)

The reading below is from Waking the Dead. I stopped at my computer Saturday morning and read this as I scrolled through my e-mail. As I began to read, Clinton leaned in over my shoulder. When we finished we just turned and looked at one another, blinking, saying nothing but thinking the same things. Then I read it again today and the Holy Spirit linked this brief excerpt to our discussion on Sunday about who we trust.

How about you? What thoughts does this stir up in you? Share them when you are through reading. Don't worry if you are not a part of this Sunday School class I'm speaking of. There is enough here for you to jump in where ever you are and make this discussion more rich and interesting.

It Will Be Messy
11/03/2007

The family is…like a little kingdom, and, like most other little kingdoms, is generally in a state of something resembling anarchy.

Chesterton could have been talking about a little fellowship (our true family, because it is the Family of God). It is a royal mess. I will not whitewash this. It is disruptive. Going to church with hundreds of other people to sit and hear a sermon doesn’t ask much of you. It certainly will never expose you. That’s why most folks prefer it. Because community will. It will reveal where you have yet to become holy, right at the very moment you are so keenly aware of how they have yet to become holy. It will bring you close and you will be seen and you will be known and therein lies the power and therein lies the danger. Aren’t there moments when all those little companies, in all those stories, hang by a thread? Galadriel says to Frodo, “Your quest stands upon the edge of a knife. Stray but a little and it will fail, to the ruin of all. Yet hope remains while the Company is true.”

We’ve experienced incredible disappointments in our fellowship. We have, every last one of us, hurt one another. Sometimes deeply. Last year there was a night when Stasi and I laid out a vision for where we thought things should be going – our life-long dream for redemptive community. We hoped the Company would leap to it with loud “Hurrahs! Hurrah for John and Stasi!” Far from it. Their response was more on the level of blank stares. Our dream was mishandled – badly. Stasi was sick to her stomach; she wanted to leave the room and throw up. I was…stunned. Disappointed. I felt the dive towards a total loss of heart. The following day I could feel my heart being pulled towards resentment. It's moments like that which usually toll the beginning of the end for most attempts at community. 

(Waking The Dead ,197 )

My own thoughts are pretty much an echo of what we said on Sunday. We can know the will of our Father - to love one another. I was going to link to a verse here but here are 10 all giving the same instruction!

We can always trust Him with the love we give to others and the love we receive from others even when the object of our love lets us down. Keeping our love for Him and our love for one another in the proper focus will allow us to live in community with one another. We can expect it to be fraught with ups and downs, joys and sorrows, faithfulness and falseness, even betrayals, because we are human and we sin, mess up, wipe out. But, when our eyes are fixed on and our hearts are filled with our Saviour and the truth of His word we don't have to despair. We don't have to become cynical, resentful or despondent. When we humble ourselves toward one another, He promises to lift us up. 1 Peter 5:5-6

Your turn...