Humidifier billowing, dwindling box of tissues on one side and an ever growing pile of waded tissues on the other, I sit here in bed. Clinton took all the girls to church so, except for the pain pulsing through my head and sinuses, it is relatively quiet here.
I so want to write about God's great love for me. Should I be posting about something that I still can't wrap my brain around? It feels elusive and hard to understand even as I read, "How priceless is your unfailing love...." or "This is how God showed His love for us: God sent His only Son into the world so we might live through Him."
Ann Kroeker in her book The Contemplative Mom puts my heart into words.
"God lovingly placed you on this earth and gave you new life in Christ in anticipation of relationship. You are His child, His friend, His beloved companion....He is ready and willing--eager, even--to relate to you on an everyday, personal level. The problem I see most often in my own life is not that I need to be convinced of this truth, but that I need to be reminded of it--reminded of it so that I can act on it and consequently interact with God. I suspect that most of us, while we're busy scraping dried pancake batter blobs off the kitchen counter, need to be reminded that Christ is with us. We don't forget the truth; we forget to live the truth.""We don't forget the truth; we forget to live the truth." - That is so me.
The fact that He has rescued me tells me that He loves me. The way he rescued me tells me that He loves me. His desire to relate to me tells me that He loves me. The fact that I am a stinking, rotten, selfish sinner and He extends His love and grace to me anyway tells me that He loves me. Ok...I get it. He loves me. I'm so thankful that, when I am watching and really paying attention (and sometimes when I'm not), I can touch, see and feel reminders of this love every single day.
Anyone else ever wrestle to get this...want so much to have this stamped on your soul?
More next time...
2 comments:
Wish you were in SS this morning. We started watching a DVD of Beth Moore that Denise had. She shared a beautiful picture of how personal God's love is with us. Want me to share? Here I go! :)
Remember seeing the ultrasounds of your babies and how seeing them was so special. Remember how much you loved them in spite of the fact that they had done NOTHING to earn that love, deserve that love. But that love was so strong and irrational (hmm...sounds familiar :) haha). Anyway, that is exactly how God loves us. It is in spite of the fact that we have done NOTHING to earn His love or deserve His love. We just get it because we're part of Him. That was a great word picture to me that I totally got. Well, as much as I can really get a concept like that! :)
Love you and love hearing about your walk with him.
tiff
oh, Jen...this is truly wonderful! i'm sorry that you had to be sick to get alone, but am thankful (for both you and me!) that you spent some time 'pondering all these things in your heart'!
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