Showing posts with label silly. Show all posts
Showing posts with label silly. Show all posts

Wednesday, June 4, 2008

Waiting

Are you one of my many 3 readers waiting for a new post? Well, here's a story about waiting that I posted on my family blog in January. I've debated over posting it here. Too much information? But, in the end I thought it was too good an example of my day-to-day experience for me not to share with all.

There are many people in my life who are waiting. Among them, my friend Tiff and her family are waiting for news on a potential job that would result in relocation. My neighbors are joyfully awaiting the birth of their first baby sometime soon this month. My family is waiting for my dad to return from Iraq. I do not wish to diminish the worthiness of their noble waiting. But I was afforded a new perspective on waiting today via my not-more-than 3 years and 1 month old.

The three older girls were off to school. Clinton had kissed me goodbye and was well on his way to work. Smallest had gotten up but decided to play in her room. I puttered around with laundry and at the computer when I heard her yelling. She had shut her door, essentially locking herself in. Upon her rescue we headed to the kitchen to make breakfast. But first I needed to make a quick pit-stop.

I scurried to the half-bath off the kitchen. In my haste I failed to notice the empty roll. A quick check under the sink and all around revealed absolutely no more toilet paper.

I called her name.

Head peeking around the door, "Whu' Momma?"

"Could you please go get me some toilet paper?" and I proceeded to describe the 3 fresh rolls sitting on the hamper upstairs in my bathroom.

"O.K.!" And off she went. She didn't return, at least not right away. I called her name twice. The second time I could hear her coming down the back stairs talking to herself. She appeared in the bathroom.

"I can't find it."

I described the location again trying hard to mask my frustration with a sing-songy-you-can-do-this-and-it's-gonna-be-so-great sort of tone. Hoping that would be just the encouragement she needed I sent her back.

Her little feet carried her to the kitchen were she seemed to get distracted by something. I called her name in an effort to re-direct. I heard her reach the kitchen stairs where it seemed she stopped to converse with the cat.

I called her name again. Then I didn't hear anything. I heard nothing for a very long time. I called her name several times.

Then I heard her hurrying in my direction, little whispers mixed with breathing. She poked her head in the door. I could only see her little smiling eyes as she shoved her fist toward me. She was very proud. She opened her small hand and there were 3 whispers of toilet paper waded together - not the size of a quarter.

Breathe. In. Out. Smile. "O.K....Thank you....Could you go get the big toilet paper?" I asked as I pounded tapped the empty dispenser.

"I can't find it."

"Yes you can." And I described it one last time. She even asked a few questions as if to be sure she was heading in the right direction.

Off she went. Never to be seen or heard from again. I called. And I called. And I called. All the while looking again under the sink and devising ways of dealing with the situation without her help. After what felt like an hour - but this whole thing probably lasted a total of 10-15 minutes - I succumbed to the hopelessness of my plight.

I dealt with it. The details I'll spare.

Walking into the kitchen I saw that the stair door was closed. I opened it. Nothing. I couldn't even hear her. Deciding not to call her and not even to mention it I began making breakfast.

Silently but swiftly she appeared in the kitchen. Proudly offering me her little fresh roll of toilet paper.

"Thank you. But it's too late." I said as I took it from her and went to put it on the bathroom sink. She followed me explaining something about all the rolls falling out of a bag (what bag!?) and how she had to put them all back. (you had to put them all back but you can't seem to put a single toy away without being told!? - these thoughts I kept to myself)

Later as we sat side by side eating our scrambled eggs and toast she chirped, "I have to go poopy." As I helped her little tush onto the potty I turned to see the toilet paper on the counter. I would be lying if I said I didn't imagine myself picking it up...

...and disappearing.

Thursday, April 10, 2008

Six Word Memoir

Four Girls: It's Like Herding Cats

I was tagged by Betsy at My Five Men to play.

Rules:
1. Write your own six-word memoir.
2. Post it on your blog (include a visual illustration if you’d like).
3. Link to the person who tagged you in your post.
4. Tag five more blogs with links.
5. Leave comment on the tagged blogs with invitation to play.

I’m tagging these five bloggers:

Tiffanie at New Every Morning
Amy at Open to Grace
Jenni at One Thing
Anna at Create In Me!
Kerry at RichandKerry.com

Friday, March 28, 2008

Tutored


The Far Side by Gary Larson. Classic.






















Overheard Surrounding the Recent Event
of Having Our Two Kittens "Tutored" and Declawed

8 yr. old - "...so they rearranged her mommy parts so she won't have babies."

Clinton to Jen - "Should we keep them separated for a few more days? He's acting a little frisky." 10 & 5 year old eavesdroppers replied, "What does frisky mean?"

5 yr. old on the way to pick up the cats from the vet - "I can't wait to see what they look like without their paws."

Wednesday, October 3, 2007

that just bites

Clinton has his 15 year college reunion this weekend. I'll be with him. Most of these people don't know me. I have 3 very large, very red mosquito (or perhaps spider) bites above my right eyebrow. Honestly. Don't I have enough to worry about?

Thursday, July 26, 2007

Offspring Malfunction

Disclaimer - this post is a major suck-up attempt yet it is true and full of sincerity.

Yesterday was my mother's birthday. I forgot. Well, I didn't so much forget the day as I did forget to call and acknowledge the day. Thankfully my mother is gracious and loving, willing to over-look my shortcomings. She rests peacefully in the knowledge that when her children and husband forget her birthday we apologize profusely and try to make it up to her in exaggerated ways. (Yes, you read the last sentence correctly. We all forgot. I forgot. My brother forgot. My father forgot.)

Here are some things I love about my mom...

She loves and gives sacrificially

She finds delight and joy in really knowing her granddaughters

When I was young, she believed in me even when I gave her no earthly good reason to do so

Although more health-conscious ways have prevailed in our lives as of late, she and I can polish off a pan of rice-krispy treats before the end of a 1/2 hour sitcom.

She can beat us all at Tetris

She makes a mean from-scratch-cinnamon-bun and the best-I've-ever-had peach pies

She is a constant, faithful friend...one of my very best

Oh...and she forgives me when I forget her birthday

I love you, Mom...so very much. Happy be-lated Birthday!

Saturday, May 12, 2007

Why my lips stayed chapped on Mother's Day

Betsy, a friend from OH and one of my favorite people, sent this to me. The author is unknown. It made me laugh OUT LOUD! So...thought I'd say "Happy Mother's Day" to you all by passing it along here.

So, we had this great 10 year old cat named Jack who just recently died. Jack was a great cat and the kids would carry him around and sit on him and nothing ever bothered him. He used to hang out and nap all day long on this mat in our bathroom.

Well we have 3 kids and at the time of this story they were 4 years old, 3 years old and 1 year old. The middle one is Eli. Eli really loves chapstick. LOVES it. He kept asking to use my chapstick and then losing it. So finally one day I showed him where in the bathroom I keep my chapstick and how he could use it whenever he wanted to but he needed to put it right back in the drawer when he was done.

Last year on Mother's Day, we were having the typical rush around and try to get ready for Church with everyone crying and carrying on. My two boys are fighting over the toy in the cereal box. I am trying to nurse my little one at the same time I am putting on my make-up. Everything is a mess and everyone has long forgotten that this is a wonderful day to honor me and the amazing job that is motherhood.

We finally have the older one and and the baby loaded in the car and I am looking for Eli. I have searched everywhere and I finally round the corner to go into the bathroom. And there was Eli. He was applying my chapstick very carefully to Jack's . . . rear end. Eli looked right into my eyes and said "chapped." Now if you have a cat, you know that he is right--their little butts do look pretty chapped. And, frankly, Jack didn't seem to mind.

And the only question to really ask at that point was whether it was the FIRST time Eli had done that to the cat's behind or the hundredth.

And THAT is my favorite Mother's Day moment ever because it reminds us that no matter how hard we try to civilize these glorious little creatures, there will always be that day when you realize they've been using your chapstick on the cat's butt.

Sunday, March 11, 2007

laugh-out-loud-ridiculous!

Ok...this is just a silly break-from-the-norm.

I was tooling along in my husband's little green car the other night...just me! I was hunting for a radio station that would come in well and found one of the Country persuasion. It's been a while since I've listened to country...I thought, "this'll do."

The first song had, as actual lyrics, "happy-meal" and "nuggets." I rolled my eyes and thought, "I've been away so long - they have run out of "real" lyrics!" Actually, the song had a sweet sentiment and a cute part about asking God for help. So, what seemed to start out ridiculously ended well.

Second song...it was was Brad Paisley. From my experience with country music, he is known for some of his humorous-tongue-in-cheek songs. This seems to be one of those. The whole song had me wide-eyed and wide-mouthed with...uh...astonishment...in a did-he-just-say-that? sort of way but here's the part where I laughed out loud.

I'd like to see you out in the moonlight
I'd like to kiss you - way back in the sticks
I'd like to walk you - through a field of wild flowers
And I'd like to check you for ticks


...And I'd like to check you for ticks. There is just so much I could say...but I won't.